We all sometimes become aggressive and treat people with
disrespect. A key is to determine why we
do this. Is there a trend? Is there something that triggers this
behavior? If so, then we can do
something about it.
For example, when I get hungry, I get irritable. When I start to feel myself going from
assertive behavior to aggressive behavior, I try to stop and think why I am
doing this. Is it really the person that
is causing it? Is it the situation? Or is it something else, such as hunger and a
drop in blood sugar? Usually the
situation is part of the problem! But if
hunger and low blood sugar is escalating me toward aggressive behavior, is it
fair to take it out on the other person?
Of course not.
In addition to being aware of this, I also try to have a
plan to deal with it. I carry snacks
with me. It helps! It may not resolve what is going on around
me, but it does help what is going on inside me. I can then handle the situation more
appropriately.
I really was not aware that other people recognized this in
me. When I found out, I was a little
embarrassed!
I had a wonderful administrative assistant in a previous
position. She would often help out on
another floor, so if I couldn’t tell her I was going to lunch, I would call her
and let her know. I usually took lunch
early. One day I was really involved with
things and it was going on 2:00 before I could take lunch. I called to let her know. Her response:
“What! You haven’t had lunch
yet? There’s no one dead up there is
there? Do I have to clean up any blood?”
Keeping in mind that she was joking, it still made me
realize that other people do recognize when we are being aggressive even if we
do not. This is worth keeping in mind!
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