We have the right to feel everything that we do. Along with that right is the responsibility
to express those feelings appropriately.
We have the right to feel all the positive emotions: happiness, joy, excitement, accomplishment,
love, among others. We also have the
right to feel all the so-called negative emotions such as anger, hurt, despair,
grief. (I do not like the term negative
emotions. All these emotions are just
part of life. I think we all go through
them at some point in our lives. If we
do not, then maybe we have a problem feeling what humans are meant to feel. We cannot let these emotions control our
lives, however. We need to accept them,
address them, and move on.)
Along with these rights are responsibilities. We have the right to feel anything and
everything that we do. We also have the
responsibility to express those feelings appropriately.
For example, we have the right to feel angry when someone
does something to hurt us. We have the
right to tell that person how what he or she did affected us. The responsibility comes in on how we tell
him or her. If we tell the person, with
respect, what we feel and why, that is good.
We do not have the right to treat the person disrespectfully. We do not have the right to yell at the
person or call names. We certainly do
not have the right to hit or harm the person.
What is considered appropriate depends on the
situation. If we want to cry out eyes
out at home, that is fine (so long as we do not scare the children and pets!). It is not appropriate to do that in the
workplace, however.
What is considered appropriate also depends upon the
person. What we say to an adult is
different from what we would say to a child, for example. What we say to a stranger may be different
from what we say to a friend.
Do not deny your feelings.
Do not stuff them deep inside of you and hope they will go away. They will not. Before you express those feelings, however,
think of the most appropriate way to do so under the circumstances.
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